Archive for August, 2011

For various reasons, I haven’t worked out in over 18 months. I’ve tried to get back on the treadmill a few times, but with no success. Now that my little guy is big enough to survive the flesh-eating bacteria that is probably crawling all over the gym nursery’s floor, I’m going to try the Couch to 5K training program. This is a training schedule that is designed for those of us that have literally been “on the couch” and now want to run a 5K. (30 little minutes, a 3 mile run)

So here is my motivation:

#1 My cousin, who has two children, is currently running her brains out and I’m competitive.

#2 I get winded picking my child up from the crib.

#3 Vanity strikes again; I’m all flab.

So here’s how it all went down; Couch to 5K, Day 1:

Last night at a baby shower I was finishing my second cookie and a Pioneer Woman stuffed mushroom when my two new friends, Courtney and Rebecca, invited me to come “jog” with them at Gold’s Gym. “Gold’s Gym?”, I asked as I licked my fingers, savoring the last bite of cream cheese. Oh right, I’m a member of Gold’s Gym- although the last time I darkened that door, it was Aspen Gym. (I believe the changeover happened months ago.) “I’d love to actually get a little bit out of my 15 year, $100,000 membership!” I joked.

But now I was in- so the baby and I headed out this morning to Gold’s. (That’s what the “regulars” call it.)

Upon arrival, I dropped my baby off in the sea of infection (the nursery) with reluctance but determination. A few of the 40 kids in there were screaming, but the two teenage girls behind the desk seemed un-phased so wished the baby luck and didn’t look back.

I climbed up on the treadmill and informed my two new friends that it wasn’t personal, but I wouldn’t be talking with them anymore. I would have to concentrate to breathe and that talking would complicate that endeavor. The Couch to 5K training guide explains that on week one, you should alternate 60 seconds of running with 90 seconds of walking for 20 minutes. So I skipped week one, naturally.

Week two alternates 90 seconds of running with 2 minutes of walking. I could do this. After all, I’ve run one marathon and two half marathons in my life, this would be easy. Right. Cue the following: head spinning, side cramps, blurred vision and gasping for air.

Half way through, I decided that if my son had a problem and the sea of infection called, I would need access to my cell phone which was on the floor. As I left the treadmill to retrieve the cell phone, Courtney thought I had fallen off. (Evidence of how taxed I probably looked at this point.) I assured her that I was fine and continued my 90 seconds/ 2 glorious minutes alternation.

I began playing little mind games with myself to keep motivated. (This is something I’ve always done as a runner, keeping myself going when the going-gets-tough.)

First, I found the prettiest 20 something in the place, who was wearing an OSU hat, and pretended that we were in a contest to see who could work out the hardest. This motivation lasted only so long.

Next, I turned on some tunes to get me pumped up. Unfortunately, I had to borrow my husband’s iPod shuffle because mine was not charged. I endured a few Journey songs sprinkled with maybe a Led Zeppelin number until a Black Eyed Peas song finally came on. Even Boom Boom Pow began to drag and I had to find something else.

By this time, I saw the creepy, and mustached 50-something giving me the eye from the elliptical machine across the way. (Or maybe he was just concerned about me, but either way, he took a quick look.) This one helped because now I was running from him. 

All in all, it finally ended when Courtney’s daughter brilliantly needed something from the nursery. Courtney’s name was called over the loud speaker, and I was off the treadmill.

Thankfully, I finished the Couch to 5K “Day 1” and made it to my car without passing out. Tiger Lilies to all of you that have worked out post-baby. It’s damn hard. Here’s to hoping “Day 2” is a little easier.



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