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Archive for April, 2008

I would like to bestow John Mayer with my inaugural T. Lily.
His songs speak to my soul and it’s not just the lyrics. His smooth guitar tones have evolved from pop to jazz from one album to the next and his writing from love to politics and back again. It’s his raw talent that I admired during a concert about a year ago that endeared him to me, much in the same way that I’ve come to admire the King.

John understands women– and without sounding like I’m in the middle of hero-worship, herein is where the lovely contradiction lies. I like to think myself somewhat of a scholar. I think. I read. I watch CNN and Fox objectively. I listen to the lyrics of a song, I’m interested in what the politicians have to say about health care, I read more than just People. (Although that’s a good one and a must-read.) And John gets me. So how does he become romantically involved with the following?:

Jennifer Love Hewitt
Jessica Simpson
Minka Kelly
Cameron Diaz
Pussy Cat Doll, Nicole Scherzinger
Jennifer Anniston

Now, before all you Rachel fans act like I just called Emma ugly, please understand that some of these women (Jessica Simpson and the Pussy Cat Doll) deserve a few more exclamations than the others. But I don’t see any doctors or poets on this list. And I just really, strongly dislike Cameron Diaz. She just defines “ditz.” Now I know http://www.urbandictionary.com/ defines Ditz with the example of Paris Hilton, literally, but Cameron could qualify.


See, she even looks like she’s about to run into someone. Ditz.

And then there’s the 2006 article in Rolling Stone where John gives his exclusive interview on the topic, “How To Be John Mayer’s Girlfriend.” Here’s what he says:

1. “Be really careful with me on the phone. Distance makes the brain grow more maniacal.”
2. “Twenty-four-hour phone-sex assistance. If there’s a cute girl in the front row, I’m gonna run offstage and call you.”
3. “You have to run every single fantasy you’ve ever had through me. You’ll never cheat. You see a cute guy at the gym, I’ll be him. Or we’ll get him. I don’t care.”

John, that’s more than three. Come on.

For a man that understands how a father needs to protect a daughter, it makes me wonder: is this because he knows what kind of guys are out there? I might have imagined meeting John and having a deep conversation about happiness or even who he knows that buzzes like Neon. I’m sure it’s a Pussy Cat Doll. Gag.

Seen here thinking about how his next song will be about saving us all from high gas prices, or just checking out the hot babe taking his picture?

But I’m still moved by his music. I wanted to run for office after Waiting for the World to Change. And I’ll buy his next album and I’ll go to another concert. I agree with Time that he could be one of the World’s 100 most influential people. (of 2007) And maybe he is a “New Guitar God.”(Rolling Stone, February 2007). He’s lovely– and his taste in women shocks me. A lovely contradiction.

Congrats John.

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